Guest Posted February 24, 2006 Share Posted February 24, 2006 Good morning, everybody! I lurked over at Melody for a while, but decided to introduce myself over here at the new site. The place looks great, by the way--many thanks to all who make this possible. I'm in my 30s, male, married. I have had a thing for fur since I was very young. Back in '94, when I was in college and started using the Internet, I just did a few random pictures for "fur." I was shocked to see an AOL site by a user called "Eflnum1" which had wonderful pictures of beautiful women in fur. I also remember a page called "The fur coat club" which had about 30 or so ladies posing in their furs in a group picture. I kept searching, and heard a word I had never heard before: "fetish." I read about it in a friend's Abnormal Psychology textbook and read about how people can have a fetish for fur, leather, or even chrome exhaust pipes!! (Wow, the human mind is an amazing thing!) Seeing the old NTCWEB and MikhailK's sites, I began to understand that there were a lot of people JUST LIKE ME! It was really an eye-opening experience. Every girl I would date I would try to broach the subject of fur. Most of the time it was just brushed off...I mean, why would an ordinary guy take any interest in what kind of coat a girl would wear? As time went on, I got a bit more bold with telling girls how much I liked fur, but never made a big deal about it. Well, that was all well and good until I met the most amazing woman...and she was anti-fur. I knew I loved the woman more than fur, so it wasn't a difficult decision to make. But she started wearing faux for me, then vintage, then conservative fur trim, and now has a closet full of fox, mink, raccoon, beaver, and sheepskin coats! Some are for play, some are for everyday, and some are only for special occasions. I think a tough thing for the ordinary woman is that they don't want to be defined by a coat...but since fur is so controversial to a few vocal jerks, that is how they often feel. Somehow, I would love to find a way to make fur as common as a wool coat or a leather coat...that a woman would think, "what would go with this outfit?" or "what will keep me comfortable today?" instead of feeling like people would judge her just because of her freakin' coat. (By the way, whenever we go out in her furs, she's only ever received compliments). One by one, women can warm up (pun not intended) to the idea that, "hey, she's just like me, she wears fur, so can I!!!" Sorry for the long post...but it's nice to have a place to post it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Barguzin Posted February 24, 2006 Share Posted February 24, 2006 Ah Foxfan... you mentioned a site I thought had slipped through the cranial crevices... Elfnum1. Like you, many of us thought ourselves to be 'outsiders' until we bit the bullet and came online and typed in that one word : FUR into Metasearch.... and then how warm and cuddly we felt to know we were not alone. My congrats on taking the next big step and posting to this site. May this be the first of many more to come. Also congratulations on finding your own 'fur queen'. That she was anti and converted gives hope to many. Anyways, don't apologise for verbosity here. If one can't be verbose about fur, what can one be verbose about? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Fox Posted February 24, 2006 Share Posted February 24, 2006 FoxFan: It is so great to have new members here like you on this special opening day. (It still is not 24 hours since we opened.) Your message is so typical of so many that we have seen from so many members here. Thanks so much for posting and I really hope that you will love this place as much as we do. Welcome to the New Den W Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ReFur Posted February 24, 2006 Share Posted February 24, 2006 foxfan, First, thank you for sharing your story with us and taking the time to post. Welcome to your new home. Hope to see you posting here again! Linda Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 24, 2006 Share Posted February 24, 2006 (edited) Fox fan; Welcome to our wonderful looney bin. I too thought I was the only one for so very long from a very early age. Nice to see you found a partner who now loves fur. OFF Edited April 6, 2006 by Guest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fox Posted February 25, 2006 Share Posted February 25, 2006 Foxfan, And particularly many thanks for bringing another one on to our side of the fence so to speak. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 25, 2006 Share Posted February 25, 2006 Welcome Aboard Matey! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 Greetings Foxfan! Good to hear another new voice chiming in again, as happens more and more with the new home we've been given here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 Welcome foxfan. it was good to hear your story about your partner, as it was similar to mine. Actually my girlf was never anti fur, despite being vegetarian. But As she was veggie I didnt think she would wear fur but it didnt take long and eventaully at her prompting to get one which have now multipled. Being defined by what one wears is an interesting point. Its only actually in the last ten or fifteen years that people are not interested in wearing clothes as an expression of individual style and out of respect for occassion. I have even seen people turn up to funerals in jeans and trainers. So its not just an anti fur thing. Its the fact that they think they should be accepted whatever they wear and they dont like making an effort, ir spending money on clothes. It the dress dopwn casual menatlity thet has undermined everything, not just fur. I get lots of hassle for the way I dress and I dont even wear fur often. People see me as either eccentric or "Posh" or "rich"....yet I am none of these things. My reponse is usually to bleat at them aggressively and that usually shuts them up. Because thats what these people are....sheep. They , in desperate need to conform, have just become part of the clothes should only be functional or comfortable, mentality. Furs are a victim of this as much as the antis. If you notice we have even had a number of years with nice faux noticeably absent, yet lots of scruffy faux. Colours are drab, horrible "practical "garments like TheNorth Face have become in vogue, so if you suddenly look different to this, whatever you wear, you are percieved to be thinking you are somehow "better" than them. The result is dirty looks. Fur trim doesnt illicit the same reaction , so its not fur, its the statement that is made by wearing fur, percieved wealth etc that is the issue. Its somehow consdiered vulgar by the petit bourgeois. But I think people are fed up of the drab and are changing, particularly some younger people.....many are now curious rather than anti. They know that by wearing fur, you are indeed saying something.....and they are rather interested in what it is..... Fur now is an expression of anti herd menatlity, and will only grow from there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
allfurme Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 Hi Foxfan, Nice to see someone else new! The best fetish i read about was for headphones! It makes fur fetish sound positively normal. In response to your last paragraph; kill all the bloody do-gooders who keep telling us how to run our lives. I will be a victim of the smoking ban in England. Everyone used to smoke and now it is "Antisocial". Most women used to wear fur and now it is "Immoral". Murder has been against the law for years, but none of the do-gooders seemed to want to do anything to stop that. I don't usually rant on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 Powerful words allfurme. Can it be there is a virus in the Borg Hive ? Is the collective morality breaking down and as you say, people are getting fed up of persecution of what are clearly not criminal issues (smoking, fur, hunting etc) and are realising that Police and bureaucratic time spent on these things are letting real criminals off the hook. I hope so. the best fetish I read about was the warm pavement shagger. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
allfurme Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 Touchof sable As Oliver Hardy used to say: I soitenly am! Sometimes even us English can be pushed just that little bit too far Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 Many thanks, all, for the warm welcome. It's amazing how a vocal minority has made the majority afraid to wear fur. Now, it's up to us to wear it so it becomes "no big deal." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 27, 2006 Share Posted February 27, 2006 welcome Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lynxette Posted April 6, 2006 Share Posted April 6, 2006 I definitely agree with the gist of the thread here. It is not so much that people are anti-fur, but anti-money and perceived status that fur brings with it. I am asked countless times, where do you wear your furs, and my response is of course everywhere. This will often bring looks of shock and disbelief form other ladies at my willingness to break from the group so to say. I think this can also be a reason for reluctance to wear furs for women...being different from the rest of one's peer group. Once one is past this however, the sky is the limit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AKcoyote Posted April 6, 2006 Share Posted April 6, 2006 I think this can also be a reason for reluctance to wear furs for women...being different from the rest of one's peer group. Once one is past this however, the sky is the limit. This also applies to men. Peer pressure to conform can be one of the biggest obstacles to wearing and enjoying one's furs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sf fur Posted April 6, 2006 Share Posted April 6, 2006 Lynxette, Your comment really struck a cord with me. During the late 70's and 80's my wife was a buyer for I. Magnin, a very classy high-end fashion store. She wore a fur to work and on business travel most of the time. After our first son was born and she stopped working she seemed to gradually become more and more self-conscious about where and when she wore a fur. It took me a while to understand how much this was linked to her not wanting to "dress better than or look fancier than" the other women she was expecting to be with. I am convinced that this swing was directly related to the fact that she was no longer surrounded by other well dressed, fashionable women. As much as I agree with your comment that men can behave very similarly on occasion, I also believe that men can also act a bit more freely in some manners like this because they have often grown up being competitive with other men. This may provide a greater comfort level for a man who is feeling like he is the best dressed and most successful looking in the room. sf fur Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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