When sitting next to someone that irritates you

[ReFur]

This is an email I just got. LMAO

 

If you are sitting next to someone who irritates you on a plane or train....

 

1. Quietly and calmly open up your laptop case.

2. Remove your laptop.

3. Turn it on.

4. Make sure the guy who won't leave you alone can see the screen.

5. Open this email.

6. Close your eyes and tilt your head up to the sky.

7. Then hit this link: www.thecleverest.com/countdown.swf

 

...And, NO!! This is not something that should really be done!! I just thought it was funny.

[Worker 11811]

Do you REALLY want to do something that will make the person's brain blow a fuse?!

 

Something that won't get you arrested by the T.S.A?

 

Easy!

 

Copy the following letter to your comptuer. Edit it to fit your personal style and situation. When you are sitting next to your intended target, open up your computer, pretend to edit this file for a while then pretend to fall asleep with the file still visible on your screen.

 

Score bonus points for leaving your screen in just the right position so he has to get a kink in his neck to read it.

 

Candy Honey,

 

I feel like I'm living in the future. Being out of society nine and a half years makes you appreciate the freedom in the modern world. I love flying, it's so great to be soaring free in the air after all those months in the joint. Freebird, baby! I am now a free bird!

 

You would have been proud. I was good and didn't violate my parole when airport security took away my Buck knife and colors. It wouldn't have bothered me at all except the Buck knife was a freedom present from the motorcycle club. I don't need a knife to protect my privacy -- I still have my Green Beret training. I remember once in 'Nam I tore out a man's heart with my bare hands and showed it to him before he was dead. He was a friend and I didn't really want to kill him but it made me crazy that he was looking at the pictures I was scratching in the dirt with a stick. Those pictures weren't for him. Yeah, he saw them, but not for long.

 

It scares me, honey, but I think I could do the same thing again if the situation came up. I would hate to go back to seeing you only through that cold glass wall -- but I can't stand busybodies, prying eyes and nosey people. Why can't people keep to themselves?

 

You say the information on this computer is safe and no one will read over my shoulder. I hope you're right because I don't want to kill again. I will if I have to, but I don't want to go back to prison. If another offense means I get the chair -- so be it! What I write is for you and me, and you and me alone!

 

For your eyes only!

 

Johnny Death

 

Then, at the opportune moment, pretend to wake up...

 

[ReFur]

[lynxette]

Linda, I think yours is funny, but of course since 9-11 that sort of thing WILL get one arrested and worse probably. Before that, who knows