Damn women drivers!!

[ReFur]

This morning on the interstate,

 

I looked over to my left and there was a Woman

 

In a brand new Cadillac

 

Doing 65 mph

 

With her Face up next to her

 

Rear view mirror

 

Putting on her eyeliner.

 

 

I looked away

 

For a couple seconds!

 

And when I looked back she was

 

Halfway over in my lane,

 

still working on that makeup.

 

 

As a man,

 

I don't scare easily.

 

But she scared me so much;

 

I dropped my electric shaver,

 

which knocked

 

The donut

 

Out of my other hand.

 

In all the confusion of trying to straighten out the car

 

 

Using my knees against

 

The steering wheel,

 

it knocked my cell phone

 

away from my ear

 

which fell into the coffee

 

between my legs,

 

splashed, and burned

 

Big Jim and the Twins,

 

ruined the damn phone,

 

soaked my trousers,

 

and disconnected an important call.

 

Damn women drivers!!

 

(BTW. My usual disclaimer for Lord: this is a joke email!)